Myself, I have one of these soft black paints on my car. I have been ONR'ing for around 6 years. I wash my car in the summer at least twice a week usually. I use one bucket, no grit guard, and a cheap $3 chenille wash bone from Walmart that I love. Granted, in the summer, my car isn't all that dirty, mainly just light dirt and dust (the bottom is a little worse.) My process includes getting my ONR wash bucket ready and sticking a wash mitt and one or two towels in. First thing I do is wash the bottom of the car with the towels. They never go back in the wash bucket. I don't dry at this point. Then I wash the entire hood, roof, trunk and windows with ONR. I might dip the wash mitt a second time while doing this. Then I dry it. Then I usually do one side at a time and then the back.
I'm not quite sure why I'm telling you all of this, but I think people go way overboard with the swirl stuff. I just polished my car with SF 4500 last weekend, but the paint hardly looks different in the sun (under the Flex light is different, but nobody sees that except me). Before polishing, the paint wasn't bad at all. Even up close the swirls it had weren't very noticeable. From ten, fifteen feet, can't see em.
I guess what I'm saying is, try to learn to live with a little bit of super fine stuff on daily drivers. I don't know that there's a process out there that will keep it perfect if you daily drive. Even if you use deionized water and let it air dry. You still have to physically touch the paint to remove dirt, you're still going to touch it to wax it, use spray detailer etc.
Polish it with a super fine polish anywhere from once every couple years to every six months, keep it waxed and try not to drive yourself crazy over it.
Oh to finish my wash process routine: After I'm done with the body I dump the water into another bucket and then use it to wash my wheels. Also, I've recently started drying with OID. It makes the surface super slick. I dry panels somewhat quick, without buffing, because if I buff right away the towel gets grabby. Ultimately the car will have some super fine drying streaks in it once it dries, but when I'm completely done with everything I go over the whole car and do a final wipe with a fresh, super plush towel. This helps get rid of the streaks that might have been left (really hard to see without a Flex light or equivalent). Again, I wait till the end, because the paint isn't as grabby then.
Maybe it's just my car, but as I'm doing the drying process, as the water/detailer starts to flash, the towel sometimes gets grabby. So I let it be and hit with a final wipe at the end.
It has taken me a long time to come to the right formula for me and my car. I guess that's what I'd like to get across more than anything. And I've read and watched detail stuff for countless hours. Over time, and experience, I think I've finally refined my process to where I'm content.