Had more than a bit of a scare last night

Don M

Active member
Joined
Jan 8, 2010
Messages
2,254
Reaction score
14
Some of you know that both my adult sons are Autistic. They are 28 and 30 (almost 31), but in many ways, they are still child-like and very innocent of the world. This is about my oldest son. Up until about 2 years ago, he was house-bound. He had a standing assignment from his Dr to go outside at least once a day for at least 10 minutes, and he could do anything - play his Game Boy or whatever, but he had to be outside. He could not do it. He would stay home when we went out no matter what we were going to do - including family gatherings on the holidays. He was very un-social, not 'anti-social' and was unable to interact with anyone not in our immediate family.

That ALL changed two years ago ... all because of a rescue dog, he named Ruby. There had been a raid on a (for a lack of a better word) puppy purgatory in a neighboring county. When the puppies were ready to be adopted out, they were spread out through the state and one of the centers was close to us. On a whim, since my son did so well with caring for his late grandfather's dog, and had shown a little improvement, we decided to start fresh with an actual puppy that he could raise and train and be totally responsible for.

I'll be danged if it didn't work FAR better than we could have ever hoped. My son took FULL responsibility - feeding, walking, training, etc. Not only did my son come completely out of his shell, he would initiate conversations with strangers and make eye contact while he was talking to them, He would, all on his own, leave the house and take Ruby for walks around the block (20 + minutes at a time). As a direct result of the walking, he lost almost 100 lbs. He still takes her to puppy classes - he went through all the classes and actually passed, but asked if he could repeat the classes, so he could improve on areas that he didn't quite get the first time around. When he first started the classes, he couldn't engage the trainer at all, no eye contact and no communication. Now he will approach her and ask questions and even debate some of the training techniques.

He also started going to family functions (as long as Ruby can go too) an has even asked to go to his grandmother's house to show off a new trick that Ruby has learned. To make things even more interesting, Ruby has SEVERE anxiety and is afraid of EVERYTHING, probably due to the conditions she suffered at the puppy purgatory before being rescued, and she takes Prozac daily. But she has completely bonded with my son, and has only in the last few months, warmed up to me and my wife.

I just needed to explain, how IMPORTANT this dog is to my son AND me and my wife, because of the drastic improvements in my son because of her. Now my son is definitely a "heart-thinker." He is is definitely empathy based in his thinking and feelings. According to my wife, this makes him "her" son, being emotionally aware and driven.

Now for the drama. Last night around 12 am, my wife woke me up and I could hear someone throwing up - hard. Turns out it was Ruby. I have never heard a dog throw up like that before. My son was almost in tears and the wife called the Animal Hospital. THEY could hear Ruby gagging and said to bring her right in, saying that it could be a few different things and that a couple of them were life-threatening, my heart fell. I wanted to go with them, but my youngest son, easily turns into a basket case at the slightest bump in life and he was going full-basket over the dog throwing up. *I* had to take an extra stress pill because I wasn't doing that great either.

It seemed like forever, but everything actually went pretty quickly. Fortunately the Hospital wasn't busy and they got her right in. They wanted to do X-rays and surprisingly she didn't have to be sedated to get them done. Then I got the 1st good news, her stomach looked fine, now they were going to check for bloat (which if you don't know what bloat is in a dog - I had to GOOGLE it - it is very serious and could be fatal for a dog). I was praying already, but I started praying HARDER. My knee was killing me and I was having a hard time sitting, standing, or even trying to walk. So I prayed: "Forget about me, just let my son's dog be OK, I'll learn to live with my knee."

A short time later, I got the 2nd good news - no bloat, no blockages, she didn't eat anything she shouldn't have. She did have a lot of gas in her system, but they contributed it to either eating her dinner too fast and getting a lot of air in, or - due to the violence of her throwing up, she sucked in a lot of air that way. Either way, they could tell the gas pressure was dissipating. They gave her 3 shots, one for pain, one for gas and one more for anti nausea, in addition to some oral, anti-gas medicine - basically TUMS or ROLAIDS. Since they had ruled out all the life-threatening possibilities, they felt that she would recover better at home due to her anxiety level.

Then my wife called me and gave me the 3rd good news, they were about to bring her home (on a slightly modified diet for a few days), and that Ruby was most likely going to be just fine. Since everything seemed to be good now, I laid back down. But first I left a post-it note on my son's computer: "I'm very happy your dog is OK, Dad."

This morning, Ruby seems a bit more subdued than normal, but after the trauma of last night (and the load of meds they gave her) I'm not surprised. But she did eat her modified breakfast well and seems to just be a little tired.

Thank God ... my son would NOT have been able to cope if she hadn't been OK, and neither would have I. It seems that in this instance, prayer works!
 
Great to hear everything was working out positive, and not a bad way. I am a huge dog guy. Dogs, and all animals, have such amazing powers, they bring out happiness. Truely man's best friend.
 
First of all props to you and your wife for raising two autistic boys for 30 years. I have a very good friend that has an autistic son and it's not easy.

Glad to hear Ruby is alright.

Any thoughts on getting the younger son a dog too?
 
First of all props to you and your wife for raising two autistic boys for 30 years. I have a very good friend that has an autistic son and it's not easy.

Glad to hear Ruby is alright.

Any thoughts on getting the younger son a dog too?

Thanks, it ISN'T easy, and with my career, I was never home enough to know exactly how rough it is, but now that I'm retiring, I'm learning quickly.

Yes, we have thought about a dog for our younger son as well. In fact, we did get another puppy a little over 6 months ago ... Turns out that Ruby (who is an emotional support dog for our oldest), also needs a support dog because of HER fear and anxiety (kinda funny when you think about it). Our boxer mix is almost 15, and is a typical old lady, eat, nap and repeat with the occasion potty beak in the back yard. She is doing exceedingly well for a dog that old, but she can't keep up for more than a minute or two with Ruby, who is fairly high energy.

So, enter Oreo. A blue-heeler mix, who is very high energy and is a "normal" dog, with no weird issues besides being a hyper puppy. We originally thought we could get two birds with one stone ... give Ruby a playmate that CAN keep up with her (the two get along AWESOMELY) and give my younger son the same responsibilities with Oreo that my older son has with Ruby.

The issue we ran into was that while both my sons are Autistic, they are on totally opposite sides of the spectrum and are NOTHING alike. My youngest must have: "I can't do it," carved in stone somewhere, because even mentioning he do/try something causes a meltdown (not violent, just I can't do it, followed by extreme anxiety). In a way, he is a lot like me, BUT with no ability at all to 'push through' whatsoever. So the idea of getting a dog for him too, was not the key to unlocking him, the way it was with my older son. We'll just have to keep looking for his key to success.

As it turned out, Oreo is my wife's dog and all three actually get along quite well. Maxi, our 15 year old, will engage for short periods of play with one or both of the other dogs - or just stand there and bark at the other two while they play together. My wife and I have been very lucky when it comes to our dogs. They have all gotten along and have led exceptionally long lives (according to each one's breed statistics).
 
Glad your sons dog Ruby is on the mend. I wonder if your son might break out of his shell if he got involved with a rescue group?

I can relate to eating too fast. Maybe that's why I am a farting machine. My wife says that I am sick and am in need of help

... Turns out that Ruby (who is an emotional support dog for our oldest), also needs a support dog because of HER fear and anxiety (kinda funny when you think about it). ).

I will be using this line when I bring home the next stray
 
Glad your sons dog Ruby is on the mend. I wonder if your son might break out of his shell if he got involved with a rescue group?

My oldest son has broken out of his shell quite well with his involvement with his dog. Unfortunately, my younger son is in a much worse place - his fear and anxiety are off the charts, and I have no idea of how to get through to him ... yet.
 
My oldest son has broken out of his shell quite well with his involvement with his dog. Unfortunately, my younger son is in a much worse place - his fear and anxiety are off the charts, and I have no idea of how to get through to him ... yet.

I have a aniexty disorder. Diet, exercise and lots of water help me. Caffeine and sugar I try and stay away from
 
I have a aniexty disorder. Diet, exercise and lots of water help me. Caffeine and sugar I try and stay away from

So do I, as well as depression. PLUS I lost my dad one year ago today. This time of year has always bummed me out with winter shutting so many things down. The holidays are just the icing on the "Bummer" cake.
 
That is not the attitude your dad would want you to have. My dad was a BIG Christmas guy so holidays get me a little down too.

Sounds like your kids got a good dad like you had.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Update on Ruby.

Ruby is doing AWESOME. She has been on "Hospital Food" since Monday morning (food bought from the hospital that's supposed to be gentle on her stomach, so it can recover from Sunday night's episode of power puking). She starts back on her regular food tomorrow.

Otherwise, she is acting like nothing ever happened and is behaving completely like her normal self :awesome:

Sunday night, while my wife was on the phone with the vet, my son was petting and talking to Ruby, trying to reassure her that everything was going to be OK. But his voice was breaking as he tried to talk, and THAT BROKE MY HEART!.

When it comes to communicating with people, I am a big writer ... I can express myself much clearer and be better understood than by talking. And I want to write my son a short letter about Ruby and how his mother and I view her. My wife is BEYOND EXTREMELY protective of our kids and has to approve anything I say to them. And I wanted to run what I intend to say by you guys, first. The letter will go something like this:

Son,

I wanted you to know just how very happy your mother and I are that Ruby is OK. And I want to tell you how we feel about Ruby, don't get nervous, because it is a good thing.

Ruby is much more than just a dog to us. We know that she is your best friend and that you care for her very much. We feel that in addition to being your best friend, Ruby is a part of our family, just as much as me and your mother and you and your brother.

As a member of our family, your mother and I will always do whatever is in our power to make sure that Ruby is healthy, happy and well-cared for. Because of how important she is to you, she is equally important to us.

Love you,
Dad


So what do you think?
 
that's wonderful Don some people just don't get it that our pets are my children
 
Back
Top