Purina Diet

Reddwarf

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Recently, I was buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, and that I was starting The Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my (unmentionables) and a car hit me.
 
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I don't even know what to say. I am cracking up and can barely type this response as it is.:D:applause::applause::applause::applause::applause::applause::D:D
 
emaxxman said:
I don't even know what to say. I am cracking up and can barely type this response as it is.:D:applause::applause::applause::applause::applause::applause::D:D
:applause: :cheers:
 
Lets try to only post the clean ones guys ...
 
And the worst thing is she probably believed you and then left the check out line to go buy herself a bag of purina to start the diet! lol
 
I thought you were going to say, you put them in your pocket and walked by a bunch of hungry doggs and they finally caught up to you lol.
 
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