DFB's Garage

DFB said:
Tried distracting myself by washing the XR6 today.



Sadly, it only takes so long to wash a car, or walk the dog, or go for a drive.......................then the racing heart and tight chest returns, brought on by a significant amount of anxiety I have at the moment. I'm hoping by this time tomorrow I will be more settled.
Click to expand...

Man I hope you feel better now. Sorry you gotta go theough that.


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Well, after more than 20 years working for the same company, today handed in my notice.

I started there doing work experience as a VERY shy 17-year-old, working a few hours a week as part of work experience, which was a requirement of the Certificate II in Horticulture that I was undertaking as part of my VCE, back then it was called VET (Vocational Education & Training). After I finished high school, I pestered and pestered until I was given two mornings a week maintaining the display gardens. It was those limited hours that spurred me to build up my own business to flesh out my income. Once I started to show my work ethic, I eventually got put on part time and brought into the nursery. I stress that I was so shy in approaching customers and fellow staff, which was what took them a while to take a punt on me. Over time, I got more and more hours, especially as other employees came and went. I was reliable, I showed up when I was required, filled in when required.................

I'm not exaggerating when I say that when I started there, the place needed a lot of work on presentation, both in and out of customer view. Me being me, I paid attention to making things look neat, above and beyond what others were bothered with or capable of. Over time, that ethic became the standard expectation of the business. This led to winning three back-to-back awards for best nursery in Victora. To be part of that was very special. I'm not tooting my own horn here, but it was my attention to detail that got them to that point where it was possible to win, then we won three years on the trot.

As others came and went, it became clear only the most hardened to the "family dynamic" were the ones that stayed. Unofficially, I was basically in charge of the exterior presentation. But as the years went on, and fewer and fewer staff on board, I was having to take on more and more responsibility for the same pay, all the while running flat out in my own business. I was working 6 to 7-days a week.

The start of Covid was actually a savior. Suddenly I had time on my hands to discover what work balance felt like. While they looked after me with regard to paid leave during this period, the on/off/on/off lockdowns were tiresome, mainly how this was handled. It was a horrible time to be a business owner, trying to balance the survival of the business while looking after and keeping staff. After the lockdowns came and went, and the place being crazy busy due to the uptake in gardening during this period, it was clear I was burnt out. At one point I was unofficially given a pay rise and given charge of the nursery, as well as scheduling work for other employees. And early this year, I became nursery manager proper.

I'm not going to detail the specifics as to where it all went wrong, it was a death of 1000 cuts. The pay rise and job title were just a band-aid on a gaping wound. I want to say that both parties are to blame, I know my idiosyncrasies and how that is projected. But I also know that I am reactive to what happens around me, so in the end, it was each side reacting to the other, back and forth in an us (the family) verses them (non-family staff) situation. The final straw was two weeks before taking leave, I was called into the office over something that didn't warrant what I was subjected to. All I'm going to say is the camels back was finally broken. A few weeks earlier, the young girl I was training jumped ship before the end of her trial. A few weeks before that, another staff member went on stress leave. See the pattern?

I look back on this and think of how strong I was to carry on for those two weeks, but my heart was broken, as was my mind and body. Over those last couple of days before, and almost two weeks into leave, I was crippled with neck and back pain. Put it this way, I haven't needed a chiropractor since, for years I've been going every 6-weeks for an adjustment. I look back on this being from both stress and exhaustion.

Then I ended up in hospital. Now, that wasn't anyone's fault, I just got unlucky with an infection that spread and needed surgery. But.................those last two weeks prior to taking leave, then all the excitement of the new car in the first few weeks of leave, I was running on fumes. Having diabetes naturally degrades your immune system...................but so does stress. So, with a weakened immune system, a simple infection went viral and landed me in a month-long recovery period.

I've had a lot of time to think about what I wanted to do, go back or not go back. I could have thrown in the towel after the office incident, but I just wasn't in the head space to make a rational, levelheaded decision, I just wanted to get out of there and forget about things for a while. But..............I didn't forget about things, I've spent the last couple of months fretting, especially the last week. I came to the conclusion that there were far more reasons why I didn't want to go back then there was to stay. So, was a guaranteed weekly pay cheque worth all of the stress on my mind and body.

This morning, I handed in my notice, ending 20+ years with the company. They had been expecting it and understood I simply need a change of scenery, a new challenge. I left on a handshake.................then burst into tears as soon as I got back in the car. I'd also been shaking in terror the whole time I was there, and had to take something to sleep last night.

I put my heart and soul into that business, my signatures still present all over the place when I was there today. I have no financial stake in the business, but I treated it like my own. While I'm still a shy person, over the years I managed to overcome my nerves and serve customers to a high standard. There were customers who were such a pleasure to see come in, they would know my name, were pleasant and asked how I was doing. I will miss those interactions. I'll also miss the technical plant side of the business, including the growing of plants and displaying them to look attractive..............those tasks and the good customers were the reason I stayed for so long.

However, I won't miss working in the rain, dragging a hose around in the 40+ degree heat, or enduring those frosty -2 mornings. I won't miss those customers that that treated me like dirt, that were rude, entitled and demanding. I won't miss answering the same questions about lemon trees every day. I won't miss the boredom of doing the same thing for 20+ years. And I won't miss being in a state of constant anxiety, then bringing that home, stewing on it, then going back to it the next day. And I won't miss the "politics" of a family business.

I mentioned the money, well now I have to find where that is going to come from going forward. I'd like to rebuild some of my gardening work, explore more detailing, and ideally continue writing for Detailing Shed in some form. Apart from that, I'm not rushing into anything other than thinking about my next move(s).

So, I finally did it. Eyes forward. New beginnings. New opportunities.
 
Congratulations, that was probably the hardest thing you'll ever have to do, job wise. I was only at my last job 14 months and I know how hard that was handing in my notice. My first job I was there 32 years, but I left because we moved a couple of hours away, and it was just as COVID hit, so everything was disrupted.

Now you can add a detailing business to your gardening business, use that customer base to get the word out, you've had the training now as well, contact some local car clubs, remember, some of those guys have no idea what they're doing. And if you make up some flyers, you'll be on of the only detailers who is actually using pictures of his own cars.
 
Big Dave said:
Congratulations, that was probably the hardest thing you'll ever have to do, job wise. I was only at my last job 14 months and I know how hard that was handing in my notice. My first job I was there 32 years, but I left because we moved a couple of hours away, and it was just as COVID hit, so everything was disrupted.

Now you can add a detailing business to your gardening business, use that customer base to get the word out, you've had the training now as well, contact some local car clubs, remember, some of those guys have no idea what they're doing. And if you make up some flyers, you'll be on of the only detailers who is actually using pictures of his own cars.
Click to expand...
In my own business, I've had to "fire" a client that was taking advantage of me, I'd worked for them for 15+ years. But that's different situation as I'm my own boss, I get to make that decisions and deal with it myself. So, other than being self-employed, I've only ever had one employer and therefore never resigned before. So yes, it was always going to be hard. Another one of the reasons why I held on for so long.
 
Ignore what I said before, I probably wouldn't follow my own advice, but there's a quote variously attributed to Confucius, Mark Twain, and others, it goes along the lines of:

Do what you love, or are passionate about, and you'll never work a day in your life.

Well that doesn't wash with me, I think it's possible I would learn to hate what I once enjoyed. I've had people suggest to me certain jobs in fields they think might really fit my hobbies and interests, but I don't want to start hating the things I enjoy. So my personal philosophy is find something you don't hate doing, and do that, and sometimes it's the people you work with rather than the work you're doing. But that's just for me.

The hard part is over, now you can choose your path, in your own time.
 
Big Dave said:
Ignore what I said before, I probably wouldn't follow my own advice, but there's a quote variously attributed to Confucius, Mark Twain, and others, it goes along the lines of:

Do what you love, or are passionate about, and you'll never work a day in your life.

Well that doesn't wash with me, I think it's possible I would learn to hate what I once enjoyed. I've had people suggest to me certain jobs in fields they think might really fit my hobbies and interests, but I don't want to start hating the things I enjoy. So my personal philosophy is find something you don't hate doing, and do that, and sometimes it's the people you work with rather than the work you're doing. But that's just for me.

The hard part is over, now you can choose your path, in your own time.
Click to expand...
Horticulture was something I enjoyed as a teenager, and with my grandmother working at a Nursery before she retired, she was mentoring me and I followed in her footsteps. Most teenagers were out riding their bikes and chasing girls, I was digging in my vegetable garden or growing plants. So yes, I did love what I was doing, to the point where I followed that path to a career instead of the woodworking and cabinetry I was also interested in. But as you say, it then becomes a job...........................which is very different to enjoying something in your spare time.

I DONT want that to happen to detailing, it's been my only savior over the last few years. So I need to approach that with care. Over the last couple of years, I've knocked back more detailing opportunities than I've accepted, mainly because of time restraints. To do those jobs would mean missing out on spare time to tinker with my own cars, in which point its a case of why bother having those cars if you never have a change to use them because you are saying YES to everyone.

And I think in some ways that links back to why I quit today, when I wasn't working in their business on any given day, I wasn't necessarily lounging around, I was working. On the occasions where I've had time off over Christmas or usual annual leave, I'd have them trying to get their cars detailed while I was away on leave, usually one of their kids who'd be home for the holidays, or they bought a new car ect. Even though I enjoy doing it from time to time for others, in that situation it crosses the line in terms of appropriateness, so I never got away from them.

At the moment, if I wanted, I have about 4 - 5 people I call right now and have cars here to be detailed. I also have other avenues to build back up my gardening business, which I had been throttling down over the last 5 years as my workload increased and I got more and more burnt out. So I have avenues, its just going to take time to find a happy balance between working in two different industries, without being a yes man again. That's what I WANT to do.
 
DFB said:
Well, after more than 20 years working for the same company, today handed in my notice.

I started there doing work experience as a VERY shy 17-year-old, working a few hours a week as part of work experience, which was a requirement of the Certificate II in Horticulture that I was undertaking as part of my VCE, back then it was called VET (Vocational Education & Training). After I finished high school, I pestered and pestered until I was given two mornings a week maintaining the display gardens. It was those limited hours that spurred me to build up my own business to flesh out my income. Once I started to show my work ethic, I eventually got put on part time and brought into the nursery. I stress that I was so shy in approaching customers and fellow staff, which was what took them a while to take a punt on me. Over time, I got more and more hours, especially as other employees came and went. I was reliable, I showed up when I was required, filled in when required.................

I'm not exaggerating when I say that when I started there, the place needed a lot of work on presentation, both in and out of customer view. Me being me, I paid attention to making things look neat, above and beyond what others were bothered with or capable of. Over time, that ethic became the standard expectation of the business. This led to winning three back-to-back awards for best nursery in Victora. To be part of that was very special. I'm not tooting my own horn here, but it was my attention to detail that got them to that point where it was possible to win, then we won three years on the trot.

As others came and went, it became clear only the most hardened to the "family dynamic" were the ones that stayed. Unofficially, I was basically in charge of the exterior presentation. But as the years went on, and fewer and fewer staff on board, I was having to take on more and more responsibility for the same pay, all the while running flat out in my own business. I was working 6 to 7-days a week.

The start of Covid was actually a savior. Suddenly I had time on my hands to discover what work balance felt like. While they looked after me with regard to paid leave during this period, the on/off/on/off lockdowns were tiresome, mainly how this was handled. It was a horrible time to be a business owner, trying to balance the survival of the business while looking after and keeping staff. After the lockdowns came and went, and the place being crazy busy due to the uptake in gardening during this period, it was clear I was burnt out. At one point I was unofficially given a pay rise and given charge of the nursery, as well as scheduling work for other employees. And early this year, I became nursery manager proper.

I'm not going to detail the specifics as to where it all went wrong, it was a death of 1000 cuts. The pay rise and job title were just a band-aid on a gaping wound. I want to say that both parties are to blame, I know my idiosyncrasies and how that is projected. But I also know that I am reactive to what happens around me, so in the end, it was each side reacting to the other, back and forth in an us (the family) verses them (non-family staff) situation. The final straw was two weeks before taking leave, I was called into the office over something that didn't warrant what I was subjected to. All I'm going to say is the camels back was finally broken. A few weeks earlier, the young girl I was training jumped ship before the end of her trial. A few weeks before that, another staff member went on stress leave. See the pattern?

I look back on this and think of how strong I was to carry on for those two weeks, but my heart was broken, as was my mind and body. Over those last couple of days before, and almost two weeks into leave, I was crippled with neck and back pain. Put it this way, I haven't needed a chiropractor since, for years I've been going every 6-weeks for an adjustment. I look back on this being from both stress and exhaustion.

Then I ended up in hospital. Now, that wasn't anyone's fault, I just got unlucky with an infection that spread and needed surgery. But.................those last two weeks prior to taking leave, then all the excitement of the new car in the first few weeks of leave, I was running on fumes. Having diabetes naturally degrades your immune system...................but so does stress. So, with a weakened immune system, a simple infection went viral and landed me in a month-long recovery period.

I've had a lot of time to think about what I wanted to do, go back or not go back. I could have thrown in the towel after the office incident, but I just wasn't in the head space to make a rational, levelheaded decision, I just wanted to get out of there and forget about things for a while. But..............I didn't forget about things, I've spent the last couple of months fretting, especially the last week. I came to the conclusion that there were far more reasons why I didn't want to go back then there was to stay. So, was a guaranteed weekly pay cheque worth all of the stress on my mind and body.

This morning, I handed in my notice, ending 20+ years with the company. They had been expecting it and understood I simply need a change of scenery, a new challenge. I left on a handshake.................then burst into tears as soon as I got back in the car. I'd also been shaking in terror the whole time I was there, and had to take something to sleep last night.

I put my heart and soul into that business, my signatures still present all over the place when I was there today. I have no financial stake in the business, but I treated it like my own. While I'm still a shy person, over the years I managed to overcome my nerves and serve customers to a high standard. There were customers who were such a pleasure to see come in, they would know my name, were pleasant and asked how I was doing. I will miss those interactions. I'll also miss the technical plant side of the business, including the growing of plants and displaying them to look attractive..............those tasks and the good customers were the reason I stayed for so long.

However, I won't miss working in the rain, dragging a hose around in the 40+ degree heat, or enduring those frosty -2 mornings. I won't miss those customers that that treated me like dirt, that were rude, entitled and demanding. I won't miss answering the same questions about lemon trees every day. I won't miss the boredom of doing the same thing for 20+ years. And I won't miss being in a state of constant anxiety, then bringing that home, stewing on it, then going back to it the next day. And I won't miss the "politics" of a family business.

I mentioned the money, well now I have to find where that is going to come from going forward. I'd like to rebuild some of my gardening work, explore more detailing, and ideally continue writing for Detailing Shed in some form. Apart from that, I'm not rushing into anything other than thinking about my next move(s).

So, I finally did it. Eyes forward. New beginnings. New opportunities.
Click to expand...

Congrats! I know it seems a lot but from what you said it is best. I know you’ll be on to bigger and better things.

Worst case scenario their business loses without you. They’ll want you back. On your terms for significant more money and respect.

Best case you’ll find a job you love. Pulling for you.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Well, I've began my 38th trip around the sun. I'm feeling a sense of relief mixed with timidness. I did however sleep properly last night, which is certainly appreciated.

For Christmas and my birthday, I was given some new tools to flesh out my collection. Which meant tinkering with my toolbox to fit things in.

For Christmas, I got this file set sold by Wera, although made by PFERD and housed within Wera foam.

9783 Foam insert PFERD file set 1, 6 pieces - Wera Product finder



For my birthday, I got this Kincrome Striking and Prying set, which suits my Evolution toolbox. Being such an organizational type of guy, I like foam because everything has its place.

EVOLUTION 19 Piece Striking & Prying EVA Tray - Kincrome Tools - Kincrome



Those two additions meant rearranging both toolboxes.





This is my favorite drawer, I've fallen hard for Wera stuff, both in design and functionality. I love how their sockets and wrenches are mostly all satin finished so that they don't show greasy fingerprints. The green and black handles on the screw drivers, Zyklop ratchets and torque wrenches do get grotty, but are easy to clean.



 
Thank you to all who posted here or reached out via PM, it means more than you realize. Despite that wall of words yesterday, there were people who I had a great bond with, some who left while I was there, and some who I leave behind.

I'll never forget the guy who was a year older than me but wasn't into plants like I was, we worked side-by-side in the nursery during my early years. He was your typical football jock, a very manly type of guy who once told me that you aren't a real man until you can back a trailer. And yet, he would jump 10-feet high at the sighting of a frog, which was quite common in such a wet environment, so it would be up to me to move said reptile. I always thought that was such a contradiction to his overall demeanor. He would be the only guy I worked with in the nursery, everyone else was female apart from the owners.

One guy had a reputation for breaking every single tool that fell into his hands. Even though I wasn't paying for the replacements, it annoyed me no end. I look back and think about how amusing it must be to watch that as a fly on the wall. I'll also never forget one of the boss's landing the $30,000 lawn mower in the lake, I got plenty of material out of that one. :lol

Earlier today, I had an hour-long phone call with the co-worker I was responsible for. I'm not sure she saw it coming, but understood my predicament having gone through something similar a few times in previous employment. We became good friends, in essence a workplace mother or wife for me. And while sometimes her work methods annoyed, I still respected her ability to make sales, bringing in repeat customers who valued her input and carried out what I asked of her. We are both empaths, so we give and give till our own detriment, so she understood me and I understood her.

Sadly, one team member is in the later stages of a near 15-year battle with cancer. When I started there, she took me under her wing, effectively becoming my third grandmother. I seem to have had plenty of grandmother types in my life over the years. She is one of those people who give till it hurts, talk your ear off, loves animals............a genuine, caring and generous soul. We had this little thing where she would call out "......DFB, are you freeeee....." it actually took me a while to figure out what she was doing, but it became a joke between us. Some customers would be oblivious to it, while others would snigger or roar with laughter. It was looking like she wouldn't make Christmas, so it's only a matter of days now. She is well into her 80's and has fought so hard for so long. Even with deteriorating health, she continued to work up until the end of November, it was her social highlight, got her out of the house and out of her own head. Seeing her interact with children heading out to play mini-golf was always a highlight, her eyes would light up.

And so, knowing this was also going down made my decision to leave even harder. I did ask if she would like a visitor before Christmas, but she was back in hospital by then and preferred I didn’t.

Anyway, that's what's clouding my mind at the moment. I need the dust to settle until it fully sinks in. Again, thanks to those who replied...................I'm off to drive my car, for no reason other than I can.
 
Deyon...that drive you took, I hope it was a long one without the radio on because I've done that before and it really helps, been there, done that️

Thanks for sharing those stories with us, I'm sure more than ever that you've got this️️

Sent from my SM-G991U using Tapatalk
 
DFB said:
Well, I've began my 38th trip around the sun. I'm feeling a sense of relief mixed with timidness. I did however sleep properly last night, which is certainly appreciated.

For Christmas and my birthday, I was given some new tools to flesh out my collection. Which meant tinkering with my toolbox to fit things in.

For Christmas, I got this file set sold by Wera, although made by PFERD and housed within Wera foam.

9783 Foam insert PFERD file set 1, 6 pieces - Wera Product finder



For my birthday, I got this Kincrome Striking and Prying set, which suits my Evolution toolbox. Being such an organizational type of guy, I like foam because everything has its place.

EVOLUTION 19 Piece Striking & Prying EVA Tray - Kincrome Tools - Kincrome



Those two additions meant rearranging both toolboxes.





This is my favorite drawer, I've fallen hard for Wera stuff, both in design and functionality. I love how their sockets and wrenches are mostly all satin finished so that they don't show greasy fingerprints. The green and black handles on the screw drivers, Zyklop ratchets and torque wrenches do get grotty, but are easy to clean.



Click to expand...
Happy Birthday Deyon, if you're anything like me, you'll be looking for jobs you can do with those new tools, even if there's nothing that needs doing, you'll make something up.
 
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Big Dave said:
Happy Birthday Deyon, if you're anything like me, you'll be looking for jobs you can do with those new tools, even if there's nothing that needs doing, you'll make something up.
Click to expand...
How did you guess! :unsure: :ROFLMAO:

I have some preventative maintenance coming up on a machine that probably doesn't need it, but I want to do to satisfy the itch.
 
This unit has been loaned out for quite a while, so apart from an oil change in September, I haven't touched it since getting it back on Friday. I think you can guess where it was, I would have left it there if I didn't love it so much.

Why can't modern Briggs engines idle down like this? It makes it so much easier to empty the catcher. I've only owned one other Quantum, but it didn't idle like this either. Perhaps the burn rate isn't as efficient at low revs like this, in turn increasing emissions? That's the only thing I can think of why all Briggs engines from the late 90's have been like that.


I fixed the choke on it yesterday, which wasn't engaging when the throttle was pulled all the way home. I also checked the plug, it was quite carboned up and actually quite loose. While it doesn't smoke, you can smell the slightest tinge of oil when its running, all Quantum's are like that though. So, I will give the thing a head job (sorry, couldn't pass that opportunity) to remove carbon from the combustion chamber and valves. I've ordered a head gasket, new filters and a spark plug. Then it will be added to my rotation.

The more and more I mess with these things, the more I realize the older stuff was made better.
 
That is how it was for me at my last job foreman thought he knew more than me about the fleet trucks i had worked on for over 17 years he asked if they could have all my books for parts and truck related material i said no i had given to another shop that was going to due all the work now it was a friend of mine have not talked to old foreman since my dad passed 3 years ago
 
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