Sad Saturday…

[Flash Gordon]

Do I have to sign a release form?

Not necessary. Only thing that I own is a 24 year old Honda civic. Everything else is in a trust

 

[Eldorado2k]

Nah I get it. Maybe he had to work.

Umm, no. We’re talking about a guy who hasn’t had an actual job in years and basically lives rent free. He hasn’t owned a car in 20yrs. and the work he does do is odd jobs such as plumbing & construction alongside other people when they could use the extra help. But basically he has all the time off in the world and never actually “has” to go to work.

Btw I just realized that the title of this thread may have been a bit much. While I did feel bad about being rejected like that it’s not something that I spent alot of time being unhappy about and I was actually able to sort of laugh about it later last night when I realized that I’ve probably never been turned down for a date with a girl to that extent, because if I had it surely would’ve felt worse than last night.lol.

The reason I picked this title was because I saw another thread with the same title and I almost posted this in there but I didn’t want to completely hijack and change the subject, but at the same time I almost didn’t want to garner so much attention because I simply wanted to get this off my chest real quick.

Regardless, I’m glad I decided to go ahead and make this thread because it ended up getting alot of good replies. You guys are great for that. A highly underrated bunch of people on this forum, that’s for sure. Appreciate it.

 

[WaxMaster1]

Bummer. Sorry to hear that.

I would have been more appreciative even if I wasn't going


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[Flash Gordon]

I bet your friend suffers from depression. I would message him again and see if he would like to grab lunch sometime. Let him know how important he is to you.

 

[Bill D]

Depression once happened to someone I knew. He practically withdrew from everything for two weeks but after that he was fine. It can be a nasty thing and how long it lasts varies from person to person.

 

[Don M]

Umm, no. We’re talking about a guy who hasn’t had an actual job in years and basically lives rent free. He hasn’t owned a car in 20yrs. and the work he does do is odd jobs such as plumbing & construction alongside other people when they could use the extra help. But basically he has all the time off in the world and never actually “has” to go to work.

Btw I just realized that the title of this thread may have been a bit much. While I did feel bad about being rejected like that it’s not something that I spent alot of time being unhappy about and I was actually able to sort of laugh about it later last night when I realized that I’ve probably never been turned down for a date with a girl to that extent, because if I had it surely would’ve felt worse than last night.lol.

The reason I picked this title was because I saw another thread with the same title and I almost posted this in there but I didn’t want to completely hijack and change the subject, but at the same time I almost didn’t want to garner so much attention because I simply wanted to get this off my chest real quick.

Regardless, I’m glad I decided to go ahead and make this thread because it ended up getting alot of good replies. You guys are great for that. A highly underrated bunch of people on this forum, that’s for sure. Appreciate it.

If I'm right, the "Same Name thread" you referred to was mine. Kind of a tongue-in-cheek way of me saying that for the first time ever, I was putting the Camaro up for the winter and was sad, because I wouldn't get to drive it for a few months.

I'm glad you made your own post. Not because it would have 'hijacked' my thread, but because by making your own, you could see just how FRIENDLY and SUPPORTIVE this forum really is. It's actually more like a MILDLY dysfunctional, but otherwise caring family, than an anonymous internet forum.

On this forum, we talk, teach each other, learn from each other and occasionally we will bicker. But when one of us is in need, either regarding detailing, or life, SOMEONE, usually several someones, will step up either in the post itself, or by PM, making sure you are OK & if maybe you just need someone to vent to.

 

[Don M]

I bet your friend suffers from depression. I would message him again and see if he would like to grab lunch sometime. Let him know how important he is to you.

Depression once happened to someone I knew. He practically withdrew from everything for two weeks but after that he was fine. It can be a nasty thing and how long it lasts varies from person to person.

Depression IS nasty. Depending on the person & severity, it can range anywhere from mildly annoying to completely disabling, to even worse.

 

[DUBL0WS6]

Life gets in the way of doing things with friends. You have stuff going on and they have different stuff and kids and sports and so on. Gotta learn to roll with. Don't take a no too personally.

 

[Flash Gordon]

Depression IS nasty. Depending on the person & severity, it can range anywhere from mildly annoying to completely disabling, to even worse.

My wife says I have the annoying version

 

[DFB]

Man this is such a true statement! You find out who your real friends are with that quote. I bet i could only count on one hand of the actual friends i have...that i could call if i needed a hand in some way that would come help if they were not already committed to something else in some way, and not expect something in return.

Your quote also rings true for family too. For me.. my brothers are this to a T! They will whine that we dont get ahold of them and ask if i even care to have a part in there young kids lives...so i told them the phone works both ways, so its status qoe..see ya at the holidays. I hate when they invite us to the kids birthday parties cuz tgere will be no relationship with the kids cuz their moms and dads are asss holes. They also never get ahold of us either. We used to hang out almost every weekend and had some of the same friends. But they were the ones that pulled away (from the friends too) when they both got together with their now wives. They are self centered, onesided, love drama, both have a gaggle of kids. We are the exact opposite of all those things, so we keep our distance and to ourselves. Drama with them goes deeper but this is not the place to be reading that book.

Im happier in life when we stick to just our true friends group and real people

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Only those without children will relate to this, but I get the scene that I'm seen as incomplete because I chose not to bring more humans into the world. That I'm made to feel like I can't possibly have a worthwhile life without a family a family or children to come home to. That because I'm not parenting, I therefore don't have things that fulfil me. I therefore become an afterthought, become a person people can't relate too, become someone who apparently has it easy.

 

[Coatingsarecrack]

Only those without children will relate to this, but I get the scene that I'm seen as incomplete because I chose not to bring more humans into the world. That I'm made to feel like I can't possibly have a worthwhile life without a family a family or children to come home to. That because I'm not parenting, I therefore don't have things that fulfil me. I therefore become an afterthought, become a person people can't relate too, become someone who apparently has it easy.

I just tell them

“It’s all good. I get that your life was not enough before your family that you needed that to make you whole. I’m OK with who I am and we’re I’m at that I don’t NEED kids or Family to validate me…….glad you had one to validate you. If it makes you happy then I’m happy for you.”

“Now excuse me while I go do a buck 20 in my 50 to the beach”

People like that can’t imagine you not having kids because they were probably really sad or depressed. There “family” changed that for them and can’t imagine someone who was not in their space that is content with out….


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[DFB]

I just tell them

“It’s all good. I get that your life was not enough before your family that you needed that to make you whole. I’m OK with who I am and we’re I’m at that I don’t NEED kids or Family to validate me…….glad you had one to validate you. If it makes you happy then I’m happy for you.”

“Now excuse me while I go do a buck 20 in my 50 to the beach”

People like that can’t imagine you not having kids because they were probably really sad or depressed. There “family” changed that for them and can’t imagine someone who was not in their space that is content with out….


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I understand people wanting a family and children, if it makes those people happy, then so be it. Just don't belittle me or dimmish my value in life because I made a different decision.

Although no one would actually say it, but there are times when I can tell people are jealous or resentful that I have the freedom to do what I want, when I want to. I work, then I go and do what makes me happy.

 

[opie2]

Only those without children will relate to this, but I get the scene that I'm seen as incomplete because I chose not to bring more humans into the world. That I'm made to feel like I can't possibly have a worthwhile life without a family a family or children to come home to. That because I'm not parenting, I therefore don't have things that fulfil me. I therefore become an afterthought, become a person people can't relate too, become someone who apparently has it easy.

As long as they have nore than one kid...just tell them simply, hey you brought enough into this world for the both of us. Lol

But seriously though, dont ever let anyone like that make you feel less than because your life choices may be different than that of the "standard" cookie cutter way of life.

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[opie2]

I understand people wanting a family and children, if it makes those people happy, then so be it. Just don't belittle me or dimmish my value in life because I made a different decision.

Although no one would actually say it, but there are times when I can tell people are jealous or resentful that I have the freedom to do what I want, when I want to. I work, then I go and do what makes me happy.

My buddy tells me this! cuz they cant go on a real vacation now like they did ever year...because they have a baby now. Lol


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[Klasse Act]

My buddy tells me this! cuz they cant go on a real vacation now like they did ever year...because they have a baby now. Lol


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I hope things change there because that's something your SUPPOSED to understand before you bring a person into the world. It sounds simple when I say this but think about this...you enter the hospital and there's 2 of you, afterwards there's 3 of you and that 3rd person depends on YOU and YOU alone to get by for quite some time️It really is the ultimate commitment, more than marriage even and once I heard my daughter cry the first time I knew my life wouldn't be the same

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[opie2]

I hope things change there because that's something your SUPPOSED to understand before you bring a person into the world. It sounds simple when I say this but think about this...you enter the hospital and there's 2 of you, afterwards there's 3 of you and that 3rd person depends on YOU and YOU alone to get by for quite some time️It really is the ultimate commitment, more than marriage even and once I heard my daughter cry the first time I knew my life wouldn't be the same

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Please dont misunderstand good sir, he says it jokingly and laughs, but i know he does miss the freedom a bit. But they planned it and knew the sacrifices that'll be made. He is a family guy at his core as both are always doing something with thier familys

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[Bill D]

No kids for me but thankfully I’ve never been belittled for my decision. I’m very happy with my freedom and wouldn’t give it up. Those around me seem content that I’m childless (not that it matters).

 

[dlc95]

Depression once happened to someone I knew. He practically withdrew from everything for two weeks but after that he was fine. It can be a nasty thing and how long it lasts varies from person to person.

I told Cheri that I feel like I've been "dead" since I lost my car wash in 2014. Part of me died with the money I lost and the failure I became. I was always an extreme failure in life, a loser, but that was my shot out - or so I thought.

It was really bad in 2015, 2018, and this time last year was probably closest I came to a self induced exit.

I've been that way to a degree since high school.

It's really sticky. Like molasses and quicksand.

 

[dlc95]

Only those without children will relate to this, but I get the scene that I'm seen as incomplete because I chose not to bring more humans into the world. That I'm made to feel like I can't possibly have a worthwhile life without a family a family or children to come home to. That because I'm not parenting, I therefore don't have things that fulfil me. I therefore become an afterthought, become a person people can't relate too, become someone who apparently has it easy.

I got that a little bit through the years.

I was engaged to be married back in 2006. The date was going to be in September of 08, but in 07 she started hooking up with one of her co-workers. He got her hooked on hard drugs and heavy alcohol consumption. She was "ruined" in my eyes, as was the prospect for me having kids - eventhough she tried to come back a few times.

My ex fiancé was the last time I considered having a family, let alone getting legally married.

When my current gf and I got together in 2012 she told me she had NO interest in having kids. We were 35 then, and obviously we stuck to that.

Today I'm REALLY happy with how things have turned out.

In July we found a stray kitten, and the amount of work it took to nurse her back to health, protect the furniture from the claws, and manage the gallons of urine she produces is enough work in and of itself! I can't imagine having to do this for a little human.

No, not for me.

But we've both experienced what you're talking about to varying degrees.

 

[dlc95]

My buddy tells me this! cuz they cant go on a real vacation now like they did ever year...because they have a baby now. Lol


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The singer from one of my bands has a little son, with second on the way. That band is done now. That and the bassists wife went crazy over political stuff and cheated on him! That was also last year. We got together a couple time over the summer, but just can't make it work.. It might be done for the foreseeable future.