Frustrated!!

SeaJay's

SeaJay's

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Alright, I know this is not the forum to complain about my daily issues but I just felt the need to vent. So, please feel free to ignore this.

So, a little background on the situation. A year and a half ago my mother kicked my step father out of the house they own together. Since that time, they have officially gotten divorced and the house has been on the market since March of this year. Because of the housing market they started the listing at $375k...they finally got a buyer and are due to close the end of this month after dropping the price to $315k and settling for $310k.

Anyway, this whole time my mom has been "storing" all of my ex-step father's stuff. Because he "had no place to put it" according to him. So, getting ready to move all my mom's stuff out she rented a storage unit and we emptied out all her stuff into that. Put all of the ex's stuff stacked in the basement for him to come get. He's had 8 months to get his stuff and he still hasn't.

So this weekend we are getting the final stuff out of her house and the ex shows up on Saturday while I'm there. He doesn't bother to get all of his family stuff (pictures, hand me downs, etc). He is more concerned about getting the outdoor speakers and a set of beer taps that have been sitting in the shed for 10+ years. My mom tried to ask him when he was getting his stuff and so on and ended up making her really upset. So, I stepped in and we had an exchange of some not so nice words. And I basically told him that if he didn't get his stuff out of the house I was going to throw it on the front lawn. And note that I never threaten him and I never even got within 10 feet of him. Well, he decided to call the police on me. So, 3 cruisers show up and ask what happened. Basically a wasted call. Nothing happened and just said to stay away from each other. Fine by me!

So, my mom decides she is going to get all her stuff out and move in with me a week early and just let him go get his stuff. So, Today he goes to the house to finally get his stuff (oh I forgot to mention he's laid off, not due to the economy but due to his laziness). Well there is a TV that he left there this whole time and apparently it's not working now. He's accusing someone of kicking it. Even though there is no evidence of that. So, he's now calling his lawyer and having him contact my mom.

I'm ready to pull me hair out with this whole situation and I can only be supportive to my mom. It's crazy how things can get so out of hand when your dealing with this kind of crap. Why can't people be adults and just get his stuff, she gets her stuff, they sell the house and split the profits. Then you each go your own way. That's that...I'm sure it's easier said than done, but this guy has dragged my mother through hell over the past year and it only seems to be getting worse. He's a very bitter and angry man and I wouldn't put anything past him. At least when it comes to harming my mother.

Anyway...I just had to vent a little bit and I don't expect anyone to actually reply. Just makes me feel better.

If you do happen to read this, sorry to put my greif on you! lol.

Thanks!
 
Hang in there SeaJay. Almsot all of us are by nature selfish to some degree. I think selfishness is the "root" of most evil. A lot of people are lazy, nasty, violent, or whatever but when it comes down to it they are all of those things because they are thinking of themselves or what makes them feel good. It sounds like this guy is a selfish and lazy pig. Just do what you can do with what you have control of. Leave the rest up to God. And don't let that fool's negative energy rub off on you.
 
Ah it's no problem man. We all need to vent sometimes, it's better you do it here with a post rather than a fist in his face. It'll all work out-just deal with it when it comes. Hope it all settles soon.
 
tfullercdi said:
Ah it's no problem man. We all need to vent sometimes, it's better you do it here with a post rather than a fist in his face.
Click to expand...

That's what I figured too....of course the fist to his face may make me feel better right away...in the long run I know it just wouldn't be worth it.

Thanks guys!
 
Being there for your mom and if possible, staying one step ahead of this guys actions is really the best you can do. Perhaps there's something dated that goes to show his neglect in this whole ordeal.

All and all it looks like his actions aren't going to cost you and your mom anything more then a headache. I cant see that TV thing flying in court.
 
Hang in there SeaJay.....I know it sucks..........I'v been through a divorce with my parents and it sticks !!!! I have also had the fist the face thing with a one of my moms boyfriends and that sticks to, so.....................

Cee Dog said it pretty good

Just do what you can do with what you have control of. Leave the rest up to God.
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Things always seem to work out for the better if you just have patience.
 
CEE DOG said:
Hang in there SeaJay. Almsot all of us are by nature selfish to some degree. I think selfishness is the "root" of most evil. A lot of people are lazy, nasty, violent, or whatever but when it comes down to it they are all of those things because they are thinking of themselves or what makes them feel good. It sounds like this guy is a selfish and lazy pig. Just do what you can do with what you have control of. Leave the rest up to God. And don't let that fool's negative energy rub off on you.
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These are the words of a very wise man!! Just deal with what's right in front of you and let all the foolishness reside somewhere else and it will all work out in the end. Good looking out for Mom! Happy Holidays!!!
 
Thanks guys! I'm not personally not concerned about the TV. Just all this stuff is really stressing my mom out and now that she is living with me I see it first hand again.

And I went through a divorce once already (my mom and dad) but that was when I was 11. Caused me to grow up a lot faster than normal, but this time around it's really right in my face and I know everything.

But I'm hanging in there and being there for my mother. She's a great lady and really strong. She's been through a lot (as I'm sure all of our mothers have!) and I just can't wait for the closing papers on this house to be done with. That will be the final step (let's hope). Once that is done she can focus purely on finding herself a suitable home (not that I'm rushing her out cause i'm not!).
 
CeeDog hit the nail on the head! Hang in there SeeJay,I've been in your shoes before,what comes around goes around.Keep the Faith! It will work out in time!
 
SeaJay's said:
So, my mom decides she is going to get all her stuff out and move in with me a week early and just let him go get his stuff. So, Today he goes to the house to finally get his stuff (oh I forgot to mention he's laid off, not due to the economy but due to his laziness). Well there is a TV that he left there this whole time and apparently it's not working now. He's accusing someone of kicking it. Even though there is no evidence of that. So, he's now calling his lawyer and having him contact my mom.
Thanks!
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Sorry SeaJay,

You Mothers roommate sounds like a real piece of work! Notice how politically correct I'm being.....

His lawyer will try to pressure your mom. I'm assuming that he has the signed contract whereby your mother guarantees the TV to be in good condition and working order?

What's the difference between a dead lawyer in the road and a dead skunk in the road?

Answer: There's skid marks before the skunk....

I rest my case!
 
BobbyG said:
Sorry SeaJay,

You Mothers roommate sounds like a real piece of work! Notice how politically correct I'm being.....

His lawyer will try to pressure your mom. I'm assuming that he has the signed contract whereby your mother guarantees the TV to be in good condition and working order?

What's the difference between a dead lawyer in the road and a dead skunk in the road?

Answer: There's skid marks before the skunk....

I rest my case!
Click to expand...

HAHA that's great! No there was no agreement signed (at least that I know of). His lawyer just basically said that if she refused to hold his stuff that he would take her to court. My mom doesn't have the money to hire an attorney (she will if she needs to), so she just said fine. But I do not believe any "formal" agreement was signed. So, again I don't think she is liable. Considering he just left it for her to tend to (it's a 62" LCD TV), not exactly something my mom can move around, so it sat where he left it. The TV is at least 10 years old, so it's possible that time just took it's toll. I know that I personally didn't do anything to the TV and neither would my mom. Neither of us are that petty.
 
Here's what you do next time he gives you any lip:

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bF9lxl9N6I]YouTube - ahhhhh SHAAADDDAAAAP[/video]


:dblthumb2:
 
Stay strong SeaJay. That will never hold up in court. A 10 year old television isn't worth more then 200 bucks. He has to be a really bad person to pull this kind of thing. Hiring the lawyer about the 10 year old television is just being an ass. Any judge would think this is a joke, the television isn't worth anything. And he had no proof that it was working before, so its an he say she say... plus the television is ancient.

Don't let this get to you.
Good luck with everything and Happy Holiday!
 
He had a lawyer for their divorce, so same lawyer. But a friend of ours found an article written about the same model TV and this is a known problem for them. So, he won't be pursuing this any further I'm sure.

Thankfully this will all be over soon! Thanks again!

Holidays are right around the corner and I'm really looking forward to them! Have a happy and safe holiday to everyone!
 
Can't blame you for venting,give your mom a big hug and reassure her everything will work out for the better.Keep your distance from ex and stay calm because he's looking to get a rise out of you and if you ignore him that will hurt him more.Good luck and don't worry about stuff(tv,appliances ,tools etc.)
 
WEST SIDE said:
don't worry about stuff(tv,appliances ,tools etc.)
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That's exactly right, Stuff can all be replaced.. Days or even hours wasted to stress, fear, anger and fighting can not. Happy Holidays to you and especially to Mom. I hope you can have broad shoulders for when Mom needs to vent because holding onto those ill feelings can be very damaging.
 
Hang in there Seajay, and Mom too. The battle of the exes is seldom a good experience. I battled with my ex for years after the divorce, and it only made the lawyers richer. Gather evidence, documents, and even police reports so you have proof against the ex's words and allegations. If it goes to court, you'll have proof, and the judge might assess him to pay for lawyer's fees for your Mom. If he can't or won't pay, he can be arrested for contempt. This might be the only way for you to get it over with. That ended it with my ex, but only after I had proof of her false allegations did the judge side with me.

And, after the lawyer fell off the boat, why didn't the sharks attack? Professional courtesy. Not all lawyers are snaky, just the ones that represent the other side.
 
SeaJay vent all you need we are here to at very least listen. The advise here has been spot on, stay one step ahead, be there for mom and keep your eyes lifted high
 
Once again thanks to everyone!

The TV thing is basically over with. Turns out there is a class action lawsuit against Sony for his model TV and the issues they are fighting is the exact issue that's wrong with the TV. So, he's got nothing there. He's still trying to claim that someone kicked it and is trying to play my mother for a fool. What he doesn't know is that she has friends who are in the AV industry that gave her all the answers.

So, right now things are looking up. The house is still going to close right now on the 29th. So, couple more weeks this will all be over with!
 
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